When Did We All Start to Hate Each Other?

I don't think it was always this way. I could be wrong, but I feel like there was a time not that long ago where people could have an honest disagreement about something and still be friends.

Recent events have caused me to question that more than ever.

Today, emotions seem to be running higher that I can remember. The year in politics that was 2016 certainly didn't help. But weren't we already heading this way?

In the last several years there have been so many hot-button issues that people feel strongly about. That must be the difference....

But is it really? That has always been the case hasn't it?

Yes. So what is the difference?

Well, as Bishop Robert Barron has said, we've forgotten how to have a good argument.

Not argument in the sense that we clash over something where there is strong disagreement. Rather, argument in the sense that two people will put forth reasons in support of their respective positions and then they will think critically about the other's position.

Now, we see something on social media that connects with what we already believe on an emotional level, we click "Like" and think "BOOM!" Then we continue scrolling.

Or, we see something that we have an adverse emotional reaction to, and become disgusted with the person who posted it. In the most extreme cases, we unfriend, unfollow, or even stop talking to them IRL (IRL = In Real Life for those of us who remember a time before social media). Because.... we assume we are good and they are bad?

Where did we get the idea that people who disagree with us are people we should not associate with? When did this happen?

I have a crazy idea. Is it possible that those who disagree with us on the controversial issues of the day might not be terrible people? Maybe, just maybe, they are advocating for something good. Maybe they are focused on a different good than we are. Or maybe we want the same good, but have different ideas about the best way to achieve that good.

Maybe people who are pro-choice are concerned about pregnant women and want the best for them. Maybe people who are pro-life are concerned about protecting the lives of innocent human beings. In either case, do these any of these people deserve our hatred or scorn?

Maybe people who support same-sex marriage want those who experience same-sex attraction to have fulfilling lives. Maybe people who support traditional marriage want what they believe to be best for society or are concerned about religious freedom. In either case, do these ideas make someone evil?

Maybe people who support refugees coming into the US are concerned about protecting those fleeing violence. Maybe people who want to stop or limit refugees coming into the US are concerned about the safety of their country, their families and neighbors. In either case, do these concerns mean they are irresponsible or bigoted?

Maybe people who voted for Hillary are concerned about the marginalized in society. Maybe people who voted for Trump feel like no one in government stands up for them or we need a change. In either case, do these views mean they are not worth our friendship?

I hope we can answer no to these questions. I hope we can make our arguments civilized again.